my baby you’ll be.

Be warned, mommy rant ahead.

So lately I’ve been struck by how big my little girl is or maybe looks? Sometimes she seems so grown up that it makes my heart squeeze in my chest. I mean, for real. Look at that outfit. Chevron puffy vest? check. Sassy Minnetonka’s that I just saw in the new Crewcuts catalogue? check. Extra chic haircut? check.

In fact, today she announced that she was a “big girl”. and I laughed and said “you sure are!” but in my head I was thinking “you are my baby and always will be. PLEASE STOP GROWING SO FAST.”

Sometimes, especially when Pk is out of town, I find myself losing patience with my little gremlin especially since she’s avoiding naps like the plague and has taken to shrieking all her desires in a pitch that makes even the dog cringe. Some times I want to say OH MY GOD PLEASE GO TO SLEEP DON”T YOU KNOW THERE IS A NEW EPISODE OF REVENGE ON?!?! When I find myself getting steamed up and frustrated I try to remember that this time is so brief and that she might be the most precocious 22 month old on the planet but for goodness sake she’s still a baby. When I have yet another conversation with someone that thinks that nursing a toddler is crazy or fielding questions about where she’ll go to preschool I sometimes want to scream SLOW DOWN PEOPLE SHE”S NOT EVEN TWO YET. I’m not sure why everyone is so eager to have babies grow up fast. I figure it’s going to happen no matter what so I might as well revel in the baby-ness while I can. Maybe because our journey to parenthood was so crazily difficult and long and she’s our only baby (for now) but I want to preserve Lucy’s baby/toddler hood as long as possible. I want to remember all of her crazy opposite talk (up instead of “down”, saying “help” when she wants to do it herself), counting “1,2, free go!” on the swing, and calling every dog she sees “Maya! ”

There hasn’t been a single stage of Lucy’s development that I haven’t enjoyed, and I know that I’ll love her terrible two’s, threes and beyond; but right now I’m letting my baby be a baby and savoring every sweet fresh from the bath cuddle and tender milky kiss.

Whew. It felt good to get that out.

Hope you’re having a great week.

-H

One response

  1. I will have a great week now, thanks to that! Give her extra baby snuggles for me. I miss you all, but especially her little hands gripping my back when I held her or spun her around. Drink those moments in, Helen! xoxo

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